Boredom Is Dangerous
by Firang
Summary: "Necessity is the mother of invention." "yeah, but boredom is its it's crazy uncle!" when an alternate Harry Potter world goes off its course, the Destiny Department picks a compatible soul from a planet that doesn't really need him. unfortunately, he might be slightly...off? SI is Harry story, kinda Gamer!Harry. will be a BAMF!
1. Chapter 1

Bored.

That seems to have become the definition of my life so far. Which, okay, most people deal with, since my world has nothing exciting about it. No aliens, or super powered humans, or magic, or… well anything. Just plain old earth. And if you believe in the multi verse theory, then that's a pretty common world to be on.

Still boring though.

So, when I came back from my 9-5 job one day in my plain old van, one can't blame me for being a bit surprised when someone strange simply appeared in the middle of my living room.

My pets were not amused. And no matter what she says, I did NOT scream like a girl. I started like a man.

She, for she was certainly of the feminine persuasion (Eyes UP!), had silver hair, and pointy ears. Oh, and I suppose there were some wings too. Made of light, which probably didn't catch wind very well, but who am I to judge, I don't have any wings. Dressed in a white… dress (sue me, I'm no fashion major), and bare foot. And she was tapping one foot impatiently- oh.

"Uh, hi?"…Smooth.

Finally, after a slight glare, she spoke. "So, you're who I have to deal with. Well, I suppose it could be worse."

"Am I dead? Because if so, I'd like to file a complaint with the manager of this world." No one can say I lacked any subtlety, right?

"No, not dead. I'm a Destiny manager for this quadrant of the multi-verse-"I WAS right "- and I'm here to repay a favor for a friend in another area. Never play poker with Sarah, she has an incredible poker face. Anyway, I'm Michelle, I guess, and I'm here to make you an offer."

"Okay, let me sit down and get some soda."

10 minutes later, we were sat across from each other, and she began to explain her problem.

"So, as some humans have guessed, the multi-verse spans any possible variation of anything, and writers tap into this to create the 'fiction' of a world. So, when I explain this, you'll have some context for what I'm saying. With me so far?" "Kin-""Excellent."

"So, my friend Sarah manages a block of the Harry Potter universe, mainly the Potter twin areas. In one of these worlds, she wasn't paying attention and she sorta lost one of the twins. The important one. Which, normally would not be a big deal. Bit of time reversal, shove the soul back in, and stop the issue from re-occurring. But, Harry-234523434290876, which we'll just call our Harry for now, didn't really want to go back, so while Sarah got distracted by some incoming re-directs from the goblins, Harry ran off into the afterlife."

"Now, this puts us in a dilemma, as without Harry there, that world will fall to the big baddie, who will eventually develop a dimensional magic to begin try conquering other earths, which will give Sarah a lot of problems from upstairs. So, she called me for a favor. See, this world is Boring. Note the capital in that word. NOTHING happens in this world, so I have essentially a free pass, as there is no real destiny to bother with here. So, she asked if I had a compatible soul that I could throw in the Potter kid's body and take over for him. You won the Lottery we ran."

Free pass into awesomeness!? Only one answer to that! "Okay."

She kept going though, I think she had this speech rehearsed. "Now, I know that it might be a bit unnerving, leaving all you know, and going into danger, but we are prepared to offer three favors…- wait, what?"

"weeelll, like you said, this world is Boring; note the Capital, I can do that too. Why would I decline?"

"Oh, okay, uhhh, I really expected a long argument here. So, like I said you can have three favors for doing this for us. Any questions or requests?"

Well, let's get the basics out of the way. "Okay, let's start with questions. What's the Bio of this Harry? Any major changes from Canon Harry?"

"Oh, Good Idea, so, I mentioned that you will have a twin, your twin is thought to be the Girl who lived. She's not, but the old goat didn't really care, he just thought that a girl would be easier to martyr."

"So, MOB-class Dumbledore, wrong BWL, or rather GWL scenario. That can be useful, provides some cover for me to get shit done."

" your grandparents are the ones who died to save you two. He also 'convinced' your parents to send you to the Dursleys. Rather he spoke to your father, your mom he compulsion charmed nearly into a coma. But, he figured he could try and break the twin bond that way, and make you his back-up toy. Shows what he knows. Bonds are a sub-section of our dept. some old fucker isn't going to cheat us that easily.

"So, while you were at the Dursleys, after the first day of the fifth year, the Dursleys were annoyed you out-did the baby-whale, and bashed your head. So, you have a lot of time till Hogwarts still, but the 'Normals' will be a problem."

Okay, I can work with this world. "Meh, I have a couple ideas for that. Any real restrictions on how I go about this?"

Michelle shook her head. "No, while you have the goal to accomplish, how you do so is your choice. Just leave a bit of the British Isles intact, please?" WHA- no Faith!

"Okay, any restrictions on favors?"

"Nothing that will allow you to just step into that world and destroy Voldemort. You have to follow along at least a little bit, lest the bosses get upset." No problem, gotta have some challenge.

"Okay, here's my requests;

The Gamer's power.

Fiction Adaption

Victor's Spoils

With those three, I can build some power, and still have some challenge over time."

She had a bit of a confused look on her face. "The first two I can do, but what is that last one..?"

At this, my face grew into that evil mastermind kind of smile.

I said "essentially, when I defeat someone or acquire something of value that I earned from conflict or competition, I have the _choice_ to acquire the power or abilities they have. So, if I were to beat a Metamorphmagus in a duel, then I can be offered the chance to become a Metamorph (for short) myself. I still will have to train/level it if it isn't considered a Perk."

She went deep into thought for a moment, or just had a stroke, difficult to tell, really. Finally, she perked back up, doing some VERY interesting things to- EYES UP! She started speaking." Okay, that sounds doable. Though, this means we can't provide any further help after this."

"That's fine. I'm sure I can manage with these powers. I have a rough idea of what I'd like to do from there."

"Okay, to prevent any issues, we are giving you a week from now to get used to your new Gamer's interface and to take care of any outstanding business. We are planning to have you registered on a free trip to japan when the empty plane crashes, so no one to have to come up with an excuse. Okay, see you in a week!"

And with that she vanished.

* * *

Well, looks like I got some work to do.

Once I confirmed the Gamer's interface was up and running, I went to my closet and pulled out some games whose powers would be nice to have. As I grabbed them, a blue box appeared.

I started with one that would be a bit more compatible with the HP world…kinda. Type Moon.

[Ding! You have acquired a fiction material. Learn new skills?]

Naturally, I pressed yes.

[Please select the abilities you want.]

I placed check marks beside those I want, and pressed Done.

[Ding! Perks Acquired!]

[Magic Circuits]

 **Magic Circuits** are a pseudo-nervous system that spreads itself through the body and what qualifies a person to be a Magus. Their normal functions are to act as paths that convert Life Force into magical energy, but humans learned how to control it and use it to perform mysteries.

Increases Wandless Casting; Magic by 100%

Increases MP by 5 per circuit.

Currently have: 25 Circuits

[Wandless Casting]

Whether through training, or inborn talent, or rituals, you can now use magic techniques that would normally require a focus without one.

Ding! Skills acquired!

[Thought Acceleration] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Thought Acceleration** is the main magecraft of Atlas alchemists. Fast thought is only a prerequisite to it, and it is truly the ability to multi−expansion diagrams. Thought Acceleration is the proof of an alchemist, while Memory Partition is a proof of their facilities.

Passively increases INT by 10%

[Memory Partition] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Memory Partition** is an ability used by the superior alchemists of Atlas. Paired with Thought Acceleration, the very proof that one is an Atlas alchemist, it is the ability to partition their thoughts to form multiple independent thought processes. While normal people can only have a single "room" in their brain and focus on one thought, partitioning adds partitions to the one room to create multiple rooms.

Multiplies Thought speed by number of partitions.

Partition limit is set be Level Divided by 10. Ex. 1-10 is one partition.

Passively increases INT by 10% per partition.

[Runic Knowledge] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Runes** are a type of Magecraft originated in the old Scandinavia, symbols that once inscribed automatically realize mysteries accordingly with the meaning that they represent. Composed of only straight lines and possessing mechanics similar to the Magic Crests, their usage is unpopular within the Mage's Association. It is possible to affect a target with a Rune inscribed at distance, but the rate of success is low with the target that possesses Magic Circuits due the effect of Resistance. In this case, the Rune must be inscribed directly onto the body. If used in combinations, it is possible to create Bounded Fields with them.

Passively increases INT by 5%

[Alteration] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Alteration** is the intermediary step between Reinforcement and Projection, to give an object a property or effect that it originally didn't have.

Passively increases EXP gain of [?] by 15%

 **[** Reinforcement **]** Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Reinforcement** is the most difficult Magecraft with the purpose of pushing a basis to the utmost. It is the foundation of all Magecraft that enhance the existence of the target by pouring MP into it, but as no clear expression of how much it can be enhanced is defined, almighty reinforcements are rare. It is the same as adding something to an object that is already complete, in case of failure the target will receive it as a poison. Success requires a good grasp of the inner structure to fill openings with Magical Energy. Reinforcing the purpose of existence would be increasing the sharpness of a knife, the nourishment of food, or in the case of a living creature, physical strength and durability. It is impossible to reinforce something vague. As living things will resist invasion of Magical Energy, reinforcing someone else is the hardest.

Passively increases EXP gain of [?] by 15%

[Gradation air] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Gradation Air,** more commonly known as **Basic P** **rojection,** is a magecraft that materializes objects, in accordance to the caster's imagination, through the use of magical energy. Gradation comes from the fact that the created object slowly fades away after being created, and Air is an allusion to the fact that said object is made out of "nothing".

Passively increases EXP gain of [?] by 15%

[Tracing] Lvl 1 0.00%

Tracing is the upgraded version of Gradation air. Referred as _Tracing_ due to the unique aria, "Trace On", that is used for its activation. Tracing greatly differs from normal Projection in the fact that not only does it reproduce the shape and substance of an object, but also its entire history as well. Objects created with tracing are slightly inferior to the originals due to the fact that only so much information can be gathered by sight alone, and Noble Phantasms are degraded by an entire rank. Naturally, as one becomes more familiar with an object, then the degradation is reduced as well.

Passively increases EXP gain of [?] by 25%

[Bounded Fields] Lvl 1 0.00%

A **Bounded Field** is a topographic type of Magecraft that consists in knitting a network of magical energy and spreading it on base area, such as a piece of land or a building, to create a mystic boundary line that separates the inside from the outside. By definition, it should not be possible to move them once they are set.

Passively increases EXP gain of [?] by 25%

* * *

'Not bad for a single game. Shame that I can't get bloodline type abilities from [Fiction Adaption], but [Victors Spoils] makes up for it.'

Next up, I grabbed… Assassin's Creed, to balance the physical out a bit.

[Ding! You have acquired a fiction material. Learn new skills?]

You can probably guess what I picked.

[Please select the abilities you want.]

Check, check, check…

[Ding! Perks Acquired!]

[Memory Bleeding Effect]

Using memories, one can earn EXP from watch/experiencing the past. Experience earned is based on POV, current level of skill, and content of memory.

Ding! Skills acquired!

[Parkour] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Parkour,** also known as free-running, is a training discipline using movement that developed from military obstacle course training. Practitioners aim to get from one point to another in a complex environment, without assistive equipment and in the fastest and most efficient way possible. Parkour includes running, climbing, swinging, vaulting, jumping, rolling, quadrupedal movement, and other movements as deemed most suitable for the situation. Parkour's development from military training gives it some aspects of a non-combative martial art.

Passively increases AGI by 10%

Passively increases END by 5%

[Weapon Masteries] Lvl 1 0.00%

A **weapon** , **arm** , or **armament** is any device used in order to inflict damage or harm to living beings, structures, or systems. Weapons are used to increase the efficacy and efficiency of activities such as hunting, crime, law enforcement, self-defense, and warfare. In a broader context, weapons may be construed to include anything used to gain a strategic, material or mental advantage over an adversary.

While just about any ordinary objects such as sticks, stones, cars, or pencils can be used as weapons, many are expressly designed for the purpose – ranging from simple implements such as clubs, swords and guns, and to complicated modern intercontinental ballistic missiles, biological and cyberweapons.

Each 'type' of weapon has a separate Mastery level independent of the main skill.

Passively increases EXP of any Skills under its lists by 5%.

Sword Lvl 1 0.00%

Daggers Lvl 1 0.00%

Hidden Blade Lvl 1 0.00%

Mace Lvl 1 0.00%

Polearms Lvl 1 0.00%

Bows/Crossbows Lvl 1 0.00%

Firearms Lvl 1 0.00%

Siege Lvl 1 0.00%

[Unarmed Weapon Mastery] Lvl 1 0.00%

Also known as **Martial arts,** they can be codified systems and traditions of combat practices, which are practiced for a variety of reasons: self-defense, competition, physical health and fitness, entertainment, as well as mental, physical, and spiritual development. Or, simple street brawling meant to cause pain and violence. Either way, it is the art of placing ones fist or foot forcefully upon an oppent with the intent to harm.

Each 'type' of unarmed skill has a separate Mastery level independent of the main skill.

Passively increases EXP of any Skills under its lists by 5%.

Brawling Lvl 1 0.00%

* * *

'Okay, a bit disappointed I Didn't get Eagle Vision, but its genetics, so… but still, a nice amount of weapon skills, and some parkour. Nice that they bunched it all together for me too. So, what's next… let's try some Star Ocean, I have a thought about this...'

[Ding! You have acquired a fiction material. Learn new skills?]

[Ding! Skills acquired!]

[Symbology] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Symbology** , also known as **Heraldry** or **Runology** , is an ability that consists on the summoning of paranormal effects inside the battlefield via the use of symbols. It is only available to a small number of playable characters, its power depending on the caster's INT stat and, when used, costs MP. Symbology has a wide array of effects, such as dealing elemental damage to foes, healing allies or granting bonuses or ailments on characters and enemies.

Passively Boosts any damage of Runes by 5%

Allows one to craft Rune Arrays in mid-air.

Allows one to apply runes directly via magic projection/alteration.

* * *

'Yes! I was Right! Crossover powers, for the WIN! I can use this to simply memorize a rune array and then throw it up. No long hours carving hundreds of runes! Hehehe…'

I stopped with games after that. Most other games wouldn't have any major benefits available, no point cluttering my screen with abilities I'd never use. I hit the anime world next. Yes, fertile ground there…so, I grabbed my perfectly legally purchased, NOT ripped and burnt, Naruto DVDs, aaaaand…

[Ding! Perks Acquired!]

[Chakra Network]

A network of veins through which flows the life energies of all sentient creatures, through eight gates, and 361 nodes, allows one to use chakra techniques and improves control of all energy based on it.

All [Physical] abilities Exp gain boosted by 15%

All [Spiritual] abilities Exp gain boosted by 15%.

Passively increases STR, END, and AGI by 10%.

Ding! Skills acquired!

[Chakra Control] Lvl 1 0.00%

Using hand signs or willpower, one can shift or move their chakra to create effects. The higher your control, the less is wasted in using these techniques.

Reduces MP cost of Skills by -5%.

Allows one to use [Jutsus]

[Ninjutsu] Lvl 1 0.00%

The art of applying chakra into the world to create a physical effect, Usually to hurt something, but sometimes for utility. Is balanced between ((STR+AGI+END)/3, also known as PHY),and INT as the stat modifiers. The mix of the chakra, the elemental affinity, and the mastery all effect the technique.

Each technique has it's own mastery, and the skill and cost of using it is divided between the two levels.

Increases EXP for Ninjustu skills by 5%.

Elemental Affinity: Wind

Kawarimi Lvl 1 0.00%

Kage Bunshin Lvl 1 0.00%

Hien Lvl 1 0.00%

[Genjustu] Lvl 1 0.00%

The art of applying chakra to create a mental effect, usually to trick someone into dying. More focused on the Yin side of chakra, INT effects these techniques. The mastery effect the cost of the techniques.

Increases EXP for Genjustu skills by 5%.

Bunshin Lvl 1 0.00%

Henge Lvl 1 0.00%

* * *

'YES! With the power the Kage Bunshin, the world shall bow to me, mwahahaahaha… okay, so probably not, I'm no Chakra (MP?) powerhouse like Naruto. But, it's nice to have for studying, and alibis…hehe…'

Um, moving on….DBZ!

[Ding! You have acquired a fiction material. Learn new skills?]

[Please select the abilities you want.]

[Ding! Perks Acquired!]

[KI Manipulation]

The usage of purely physical power, controlling this allows one to surpass their bodies' physical limits and manipulate this energy freely.

Passively increases Chakra control EXP gain by 25%

Passively increases STR, END, and AGI by 10%

Ding! Skills acquired!

[Ki Blast] Lvl 1 0.00%

A basic blast of pure Ki. Hurts badly if you cannot defend with Ki.

[Ki Aura] Lvl 1 0.00%

By covering your body with a layer of Ki, your DEF increases greatly.

Increases DEF by 75% when active.

Increases DEF by 5% passively.

* * *

Not bad. The defense will really help when facing the nastier bosses. Okay, two more for anime I think. So, let's start with Bleach!

[Ding! You have acquired a fiction material. Learn new skills?]

[Please select the abilities you want.]

[Ding! Perks Acquired!]

[Reiryoku Control]

Allows one to control the power of one's spirit, enabling one to fight against spiritual entities.

Passively increases Chakra control EXP gain by 25%

Passively increases INT and WIS by 10%

* * *

'…wait, what!? Oh, damn, most of their abilities are tied to their beings, so I'd have to use [Victor's Spoils] to gain much of anything from them. Well, the [Reiryoku Control] is nice, at least for the exp gain and stat boosts.'

Finally, I grabbed my disc of full metal Alchemist.

[Ding! You have acquired a fiction material. Learn new skills?]

[Ding! Skills acquired!]

[Alchemy] Lvl 1 0.00%

 **Alchemy** is the ancient metaphysical science/mystical art of manipulating and altering matter by using natural energy. This act is known as "Transmutation", and its sequence is usually described as Comprehension - Understanding the inherent structure and properties of the material, Deconstruction - Using energy to break down the physical structure of the identified material, and Reconstruction - Continuing the flow of energy so as to reform the material into a new shape. The basic tenet at the very foundation of all alchemy is that of Equivalent Exchange.

Passively increases INT by 10%

* * *

'Yup, that should help with first year, at least. I think that should do for now. '

Finally finished with 'earning' some new skills, I practiced my mental skills as much as I could, seeing as I'd be in a new body soon anyway and was not sure how the crossover would work with physical skills. Abusing the Kage Bunshin as best I could, I focused on training in Thought Acceleration and Memory Partition, as well as Alchemy. After all, I'd be encountering it's most powerful artifact first year, so best to be prepared.

Finally, the week was over. I packed all the Fiction materials i could find in my inventory, and wrote a note for my family using the excuse Michelle had handy, and grabbed the ticket she had left there. After boarding the plane, I was suddenly and _uncomfortably_ yanked from my World.

* * *

AN: so, this is the first story I've written, and a I figured I should explain some things about this fic so you don't get lost. or complain about somthing

While I am using the Gamer Hero cliché, I won't really focus on it past this chapter, and won't bother keeping track of stats at all. This is used as a background effect to make it easier for me, and you by extension to track the powers he obtains. it also work well as a power-he-knows-not, i think.

The fiction adaption ability is something I read in another story on this site, called Gamer Overmind. I thought it would be useful if I were to ever be stuck in such a situation, so I shamelessly grabbed it up. I **do NOT** , however, take credit for it.

The [Victor's Spoils] is a unique power I came up with, which I wanted to use as both a booster and limiter. While he can gain awesome abilities and perks from anything, he has to win first. Also, it means the Fiction adaption is not going to let him earn bloodline/personal/unique powers that only this one guy can do. He'd have to actually go and beat that guy with that power in that world to get it. it's why bleach was so limited, all the powers there are essentially tied to them, and are unique. Also why I ignored One piece (for now).

This is essentially a SI fic. I wrote in First person, since I going to write the story as though I were in this world.

I will very likely not respond to many reviews. Sorry, mom told me not to talk to strangers.

I wrote this in one afternoon. I severely doubt its perfect, but I wanted to get this out of my head so the voices would shut up. I may not respond, but I will likely accept any advice or ideas for plots and at least consider them.

I WILL NOT place any reviewer responses at the top of my fan fictions most author notes will be at the bottom of the fic unless it is important.

Don't ask for Timetables. I don't really know. I could release it tomorrow, it could be next month, (which is also tomorrow. Dammit.)

This is going to be rated mature. I will curse, use gratuitous violence and get laid in this pic. It will likely be a multi pairing. It will not include lemons, as I don't believe I can write them and do them justice. Use the perviness, and imagine it when I mention it.


	2. Chapter 2

Pain.

Throbbing, aching pain. Right on the crown of my head. I tried to remember what was happening, when it came back, painfully, in a rush.

'Seems Michelle was a bit impatient. I got pulled away right as I stepped in the plane. '

Owww.

I cracked my Eyes open slowly, knowing where I'd likely be, to see a dark closet. Or cupboard, as the Brits would say, I suppose. Groaning in pain, I slowly sat up, and checked my head. 'Good, the wound appears to have healed.' First goal, is to get the Dursleys in enough trouble that the MOB will take too long to both get them out of it and catch me leaving. So, start Operation: Whale Hunt, with a side Giraffe, but not poaching, because that's wrong… it sounded better in my head.

"Inventory."

As the screen opened, I start to look through my collection of tools, and I found what I wanted. A camera. I started snapping pictures of my area, then, glancing outside to see if it's late enough, pulled out a knife to pop the latch.

I went around the house, snapping pictures or the house, especially the family pictures I'm excluded from, and the baby whale's two bedrooms. (Really, the coke-heads think this is _normal_?)Then, writing a very sophisticated letter, I stole an envelope and stamp from the Papa Whale's desk, and mailed it off. To BBC. With copies to the newspapers, and the police. And child services. And the Prime minister. And even MI-5. Just in case. They might have a magic dept. or something.

With that, I gathered anything I had in my closet, shoved it in my inventory, and stepped out of this house for the last time. But, seeing Vernon's car, I couldn't help but to slash his tires. All four. And drained his oil. Get to walking, hehehe.

* * *

So, I stepped onto the corner of Privet drive, raised my hand, and let loose a burst of noise. I kinda hope this works, it suck if the- ah, there it is… The Knight Bus. As it pulled up, the conductor opened the door, and blinked a couple times before speaking.

"'ello there, where's your mum, then tyke? She summon the Bus for you?" putting on my prodigious acting skills, (I was in a play, in middle school.) I spoke with my best kid voice, "I think I appernated, I don't know where I am, we was in the Alley, and then some mean guy yelled, and iwasscaredandhewascomingcloserand-" "whoa, slow down, there, it's okay, c'mon then, no charge, it's happened ta kids before. We'll get ya to the Alley yet. What's your name there?" "Riddle, Tom Riddle" I know, it's dick move to look like a scared little brat and use my mortal enemies name, but the pulled the gloves off trying to kill brats. Me. Us?

Anyway, the conductor (Stanford, or something, not important) helped me get onto the bus, and even gave me a cocoa for free. (Which I took one sip of, then threw out the window when he wasn't looking.) After a fairly smooth ride (for the Knight Bus), I was at Charing Cross road, and across from the Leaky Cauldron. Thanking Stanley, I entered the Pub, and slipped into the back. Where I proceeded to wait. And wait. And wait some more. Geez, it's three in the morning, it's a perfectly reasonable time, where is everyone. After taking a nap behind a comfy dumpster, finally some people showed up around 9 o'clock. Following them through, I way straight for Gringotts. I had two things to do, and I could only hope they went right.

As I entered, I ignored the plaque, (since I might actually NEED to steal something from the bank, I can now claim plausible deniability.) And nodded to the Goblins with the shiny pole arms. Approaching the first teller, I decided to get this over with.

"Excuse me, I like to take an Inheritance test, and check to see if my trust vault is still active. The latter first, please."

The goblin grunted, and pulled out the iconic dagger and parchment (what, you expect a DNA sequencer?) and held them out to me. Slashing my palm, and making no unmanly noises whatsoever (Binns will tell you, Goblins are liars!), I spread some blood on the Parchment. As the words appeared, the Goblin started nodding.

"Trust Vault 777 (lucky!) is open, set to refill to 2000 galleons, every July 31st until your 17th birthday. You are eligible to receive the following houses;

Potter: Heir Presumptive (signed by James Potter, November 3, 1981)

Peverell: Heir Apparent

Slytherin: Lord By Conquest (October 31, 1981)

Gryffindor: Second-in-Line, behind Ivy Potter (signed by James Potter, November 3, 1981)

Black: Heir Presumptive, named by Godfather (unless Current Head has Child before his thirtieth year of life, or Heir Presumptive reaches 11, by 1991)"

* * *

That's…pretty good. About what I was expecting. But… "Did James Potter give cause as to why I was not named Heir Apparent?"

"Yes, He claimed that as you showed no talent compared to your sister, that he thought you were a squib, and as such were to be cast aside after Hogwarts failed to send you a letter at 11."

"So, He's a blow horn For Dumbledore then. Good to know. Well, the will obviously not be happening, so, I'd like to know when the earliest I can file for Emancipation is."

"There is not a lawfully defined age, just that the wizard is deemed eligible, and has the support to care for himself."

"Great, I'd to begin proceedings to claim the title of Lord Slytherin, and emancipate myself. I'd also like to know what other services Gringotts provides, and a price sheet if one is readily available."

The teller called over a Cart Goblin to take me to the Inheritance office to file the papers, and accept my rings (after all, once I'm of age, any titles I can claim will be claimed.)

Looking over the list, I notice it includes a notice that any cursed objects that could cause damage to the goblin nation cannot be stored in vaults, including dark artifacts. Pretty sure Horcruxes are included. Oh, and they sell House elves. Score, no chores for me!

After claiming my two available rings, Slytherin and Peverell, I spoke with the Goblin, saying I heard one of the Lestrange's old Death Muncher Buddies saying how they got one over on the goblins by storing a horcrux they got from Egypt in their vault, and hoping it would take over a goblin, and destroy their nation. They were less than pleased, and when they did indeed discover the Horcrux, they gave the rest of the gold to my vault, and a free House elf as well. That is what you call a home run!

After examining the holdings I had, I found a nice little townhouse the Peverells had owned in Godric's Hollow (Ironic, yes?). As I was leaving the bank, I bumped into a young girl, with bubblegum pink hair.

"Hey, watch where you're going!" she screamed at me, as her hair turned red on its own. Oh my, a metamorphmagus. Now, how can I get into a fight with her…?

* * *

AN: much shorter, now that the whole chunk of powers and such are out of the way. Yeah, I pulled the Inheritance card, but I actually used a few less common rules, as to why he can't just grab all the titles. First, James is currently Lord Potter. He needs a Real reason to disown someone. No random "I like her better, so she's the Heir" here.

Yeah, Dumbledore is going to have a few bad weeks, as I imagine Lily is going to be quite irate (and probably pretty resistant to compulsions after being ODed for 5 or so years). And Ivy, our Twin, is one to follow her mom, plus she still feels the twin bond in the background, so knows a part of her is missing.


	3. Chapter 3

When Dumbledore woke up this morning, he was planning taking his time to down a bowl full of lemon drops, send out responses to any mail and further his plans for The Greater Good.

So, it could be understood when he woke up to the Floo screaming for him, asking him to get down to Privet Drive as soon as possible, he was slightly perturbed. When he arrived there, and saw the police cars trying to take the Dursley's away, he was miffed. When he was told by his minion- his under- his _colleague_ , Mrs. Figg, that the Potter brat was gone, and the abuse was laid out for the entirety of the Muggle world to see, he was quite put out. Then, to be called out to Diagon alley to settle a children's spat, well, one could understand he was slightly shorter with the Aurors then he might otherwise be.

The Auror, a Dawson, or something, ran up to him and said "Dumbledore, thanks for coming, we really didn't know what to make of this case, and could use someone with your reputation for the more…obscure magics."

"Of course, my boy, of course, let's take a look. I don't mean to rush, but something has come up that I need to take care of as soon as possible."

"Absolutely, Sir, she's over here. She and another young child bumped into each other in front of Gringotts earlier, and some words were exchanged. The young girl, a Nymphadora-"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

"-Tonks, challenged the boy to a wizards duel. With them both being underage, I didn't think much of it, so just sat there to watch and make sure nothing happened. Which is when it took a turn for the strange…"

!

"What did you say to me!?" my victim- I mean the nice metamorph said

"That if you were less focused on fixing your face and hair up to look pretty, maybe you'd look where you were going."

Now, obviously, I didn't really think that, I wasn't paying the least bit of attention to where I was going. BUT, I needed her to challenge me to a duel if I wanted to get her awesome powers through [Victor's Spoils].

"that's it, I challenge you to a duel!"

Well, that was easy.

"Okay, but since you challenged me, I will pick the rules!"

"FINE!"

"If you are unable to continue, then for 5 seconds, then the match is over."

"Prepare to eat the ground!"

The adults around us weren't really taking it seriously, but humored us enough to give us a small circle. An Auror, Daymond, or something, stepped up to ref.

"Okay, the first to be unable to continue for 5 seconds is the winner of this duel. Participants ready!?"

"Yup." "YEAH!"

"BEGIN!"

I don't really take pride in my next move, but I'm not ashamed either, I'm just stating how it went down. Most of my current abilities were destructive or painful to the average human or wizard, but there was one thing that could immobilize any witch. And it came from an Ecchi anime of all things.

"Akuma no Taijutsu Ougi: Doresubureiku!"

If you know Japanese, or have Google translate handy, you will know what I did. Using Reinforcement Magecraft, I pushed mana into her clothes, until they shattered, leaving her naked. A bit of a bastard move, but hey, shinobi don't play fair…I feel like I'm getting something mixed up… ah, well.

Congratulations, you've made a new skill!

I felt a bit dirty.

As expected, she immediately fell to her knees to cover up. And was unable to do anything for the foreseeable future. The Auror stunned speechless, had to be nudged to declare me the winner of the pre-Hogwarts dueling championships...and then the thankful pop-up.

[You've defeated a Metamorphmagus! Acquire Perk Metamorphmagus?]

Of course, I instantly hit yes.

Ding! Perks Acquired!

[Metamorphmagus] [Lvl 1 0.00%]

Never be the same you twice! With **Metamorphmagus** , you can alter your appearance at will. As you level this ability up you can change more things and for longer time periods.

Allows Change human form:

Hair

Ears

Skin

Time limit: 1 hour per level per day. (day ends upon sleeping)

!

Okay, I had hoped that I would get it at the full level, but good enough. With that, I quickly slipped into the crowd, and shifted my hair brown, and darkened may skin tone a bit. With that, I slipped out of the crowd and into the Flourish and Blotts Bookstore. And promptly started buying out their stock. Any and every book I could. Which I promptly had shrunken and stored. I was particularly hopeful that the spell books would act as skill books, and also VERY interested in the "1001 Rituals for the Discerning Witch or Wizard". Could have some goodies in there.

My next stop was the potions store, where I did the same thing with ingredients. No point in needing and now having, and all that. I then, called my new house elf, Wilbur, to take everything back to our new home in the Hollow. After confirming that the Potters aren't living in said house, of course.

Then, I returned to the Bank, and ordered the best Goblin Wards over the house that money can buy, including a Fidelius Charm. I also scheduled an appointment to meet with their healer and a curse breaker, to look at my scar and get my wizard's shots. With a team of warders, I finally left for Godric's Hollow via portkey. Which, as it turned out, was just as an old bastard was apparating in.

When we arrived, I did a quick look around the property, and then the warders got to work. We made good old Wilbur my Secret Keeper, then had the Goblins witness the Unbreakable vow between us to confirm, that we only reveal the location if both of us were in full function. So, no Imperious or torture should be able to rip it out of Wilbur's head. Of course, wizards wouldn't think of using a house elf as a secret keeper anyway.

With that taken care of, we said goodbye to the goblins, and Wilbur went shopping for groceries and supplies. Meanwhile, I got to work reading my new library through, while training my Metamorph powers. My first goal; Occlumency. Combining this with Thought Acceleration and Memory Partition should let me turn myself into a bio-supercomputer. As I grabbed the first Occlumency book, I got the expected pop-up.

[Ding! You've acquired a skill book! Learn Occlumency?]

After clicking yes, I found the knowledge just pouring into my head as to how to go about it. And luckily, the three mental disciplines were very compatible with each other, so there was a bit of an XP boost.

[Occlumency] [Lvl 15 66.69%]

 **Occlumency** is the act of magically closing one's mind against Legilimency. It is ancient, and has existed since medieval times. It can prevent a Legilimens from accessing one's thoughts and feelings, or influencing them. A person who practises this art is known as an **Occlumens**. A skilled Occlumens can resist mental controls, and a master can build their own mindscape, which can give one conscious control of normally subconscious or unconscious actions.

At level 5, can build shields to resist initial probe of Legimency/telepathy.

At level 25, can completely cloak one's mind, leaving it "blank". Preventing on from reading one's mind.

At level 60, can build a "false mind" around you mind, allowing one to project false or misleading information to intruders, allowing one to deny knowledge of things easier.

At level 95, can build the "mindscape" the Pinnacle of mental arts. Allows absolute control over the mind, and conscious control over one's body.

Passively increases INT and WIS by 15%

Fuck…yes.

Grabbing another book on Occlumency, I get the message I was hoping for.

[Skill book acquired. Add EXP to Occlumency?]

Yesyesyes!

[ding! Occlumency has leveled up.]

After going through all the books, and using all the skill books, I now get to practice what I can, and read the rest. Hehehehe!

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

POOF!...

AN: so, yeah, I'm kinda rushing through these chapters, but that's because it's all just set up to get to the Hogwarts years, and I really don't think I could write a novel of the before years.

one of my reviewers pointed out that fiction adaption instantly creates OP characters. and in a way that is true. but, I retrained myself at least a bit by excluding any bloodlines from that ability. also, i did forewarn you that he'd be a Bad Ass Mother Fucker (BAMF) in the description.

my humor is a bit crass, but I won't claim it's for everyone. I don't mind if you don't enjoy it, I'll live if you don't want to continue reading afterwards.

as far as Libriomancy and others... I wouldn't count anything out. remember, he has a crap ton of fiction just shoved in his inventory, waiting for him to play with. he won't just pull it out mid-battle, use it, then insta-gib everyone. but, this is essentially a crack fic, so he will probably do that before needing to.


	4. Chapter 4

Ivy was walking into the library after having listened to her _father_ trying to arrange another social function where he'd lord his Trophy-Girl-Who-Lived (Copyright pending) around to sooth his big head. She was not amused. Her mother was again sitting in the corner looking a bit lost with a book in her lap.

"Hey mom, do I _have_ to go to this party? It's always nothing but grown-ups, and they never let me play!"

Looking up from her book, her eyes seem to come into focus a bit, and she smiled at her - closest - child? And her eyes slipped out of focus just a bit again.

"I'm afraid so, sweetie, your father must know best, right?"

Hearing this, Ivy simply rolled her eyes. Since she could remember, this is a how it always went. Ivy would try to ask her mom something, and it always be sent back to _him_. Huffing, she stomped off to her own corner of the library.

Going to her table, where she had her books to escape from this crappy family for a bit longer, she noticed a couple new books had been placed on the pile that weren't there before. Without noticing the red glowing eyes staring at her from the dark corner of the roof, she picked up the books and looked at the titles.

"What is this…? Getting Sempai to Notice Me? Icha Icha: Family Fun Edition! Managing a Coven for the Discerning Alpha Witch!? I don't get it? These aren't what dad normally lets me read…"

As she cracked open the first book, a creepy cackling could barely be discerned if one were listening form the corner with the red eyes.

"hehehe, the D.D. aren't the only ones who can play around with other worlds!"

!

As I continued to study and level my abilities I realized that there was an interesting problem with my gamer system. While I could gain levels with just reading and absorbing skill books, there seemed to be a 'cap' on theoretical EXP, and practical EXP. For example, I could read about Occlumancy all day, but if I didn't try to build any shields I'd never get anywhere near a level up. It seemed balanced for each level between 50/50 for earlier levels, where theory is more important, but I as continued to level, the Practical EXP began to take a larger portion of the level bar.

Which meant I couldn't turn into a hermit and chill at the house till Hogwart's time like I planned. I'd have to go hunting. So, again popping over to Diagon, I looked around for some form of travel agency. I found a few over at Later Ally, a different offshoot from further along the way. Buying the multi-destination port-key, a travel tent, just in case, and some language books (cause skills…and I only speak English), I packed all my stuff into the new tent and got ready to leave for France, when I saw the package of documents from my new lordships, Slytherin and Peverell. The others being out of reach, having double lordship is still cool.

After skimming through anything that's boring, I found something that would REALLY cause some chaos while I'm travelling. So, following my motto (if I had one), I went to Gringotts to enact this latest headache for the MOB and dear old dad (henceforth known sarcastically as DoD, as a prank on dear Michelle). Stepping through the entrance, I went up to the next available teller.

"Hello, I need to disown myself from the Potter family…"

!

James was enjoying his current little soiree at the moment, and he felt his life couldn't be better. He had a famous child, got rid of his useless squib child, and had a hot wife he had under his thumb. So, when he saw his elf trying to motion to him urgently, he snuck off just a tad bit annoyed.

"What Joffrey? I was just telling the Minister how I held off you-know-who for the hour my Daughter needed to destroy him!" Let it never be said that James needed logic to regale an audience with a story.

"Pardons, sir, but yous said to always tell you ifs a contract for Missy Ivy appeared."

"I'll Deny it later-" James started before Joffery quickly blurted out;

"Its being signed already, by olds master's great great great dads!"

There was a moment of silence, before, forgetting where he was, he bellowed, "WHAT! To WHO!?"

James was fuming, until he finally noticed how quiet the room was behind him. Eyes widening, he tried to stop him from speaking, but it was too late.

"a-a-a Lord Peverell, sirs…"

Total silence met this declaration…

!

Cackling gleefully as I landed down in France, I went over the shit storm I had unleashed on Wizarding Britain. By Renouncing myself from the Potter line, an old contract from centuries ago that was still valid immediately went into effect. (as the contract said that the Potter line must marry into the Peverell line, the marriage which folded the Peverells into the Potter line was not applicable; magic is touchy that way) this wasn't the kind of contract that was easy to break either. Americans have a saying that it would take an act of Congress to get something done. Well, even the Wizengamot would not be breaking this contract. It was tied into the old family magics, laid by the first Mage's Council Millennia ago in Atlantis. The City may be gone, but the magics remain, weaved into the leylines themselves. They'd have to dig into the leylines, delete the old laws, and re-write them to cancel this contract. And they'd be more likely to destroy the planet doing so.

Still lost in my demented cackling as I walked along, I failed to notice that I was heading right towards a river.

" _Fais-_ «

SPLASH !

"- _attention… »_

As I looked up from my new swimming pool, I saw a cute little blonde, who was actually a few years older than me, looking a bit concerned at me.

 _«_ _Est ce que tu vas bien?_ _"_

 _!_

Lily was walking into her bedroom, which was separate from James', in a daze after the end of his little tirade about the contract that had just been enabled. She wasn't really sure why it was bad, but James said it was, so that's what mattered, right…?

As she walked to her bedside table, she noticed new books atop her nighttime reading. As she picked them up to look at them, no one noticed a malevolent chuckle coming from the direction of a pair of glowing red eyes…

!

 _ **AN: I'm Back! Hide Your Wife! Hide your of-age daughters! They be writing chapters all up in here!**_

 _ **The delay was for two reasons; one, I had originally meant this to be a serious, dark, bloody version, and it really got away from me. (now I can relate to authors who say that.) I may still write that version later, but for now, I've decided to commit to writing through this story.**_

 _ **Secondly, I was reading my new favorite Genre; Xianxia. These are Chinese cultivation Stories, and they tend to be pretty epic. After binging on these for the last year and a half, I've also gathered a few more ideas and concepts I can pull from the ether whenever I want to. Remember, Harry's inventory contains whatever fiction I might want to have him pull out.**_

 _ **Okay, so wasn't really sure where to go for the next 7 or so years while waiting for the Hogwarts letter, so I sent him packing from Britain. I probably won't really go into his travels, just pull the results out as I need them (Retcon power is now in MY hands. So this is what the comic books writers feel…)**_

 _ **For those guys/girls/in-betweens/aliens that are a bit squicky at the whole 'marry your sister' thing, three points;**_

 _ **His soul is no longer Harry's.**_

 _ **His Name is no longer legally Potter.**_

 _ **With all the powers he'll be getting from Victor's Spoils, you honestly think his genes will stay the same by the time any kids come about?**_

 _ **Essentially, he may be the true BWL, but nowhere does it say he has to stay Harry Potter. Also, I may not even have him hold the contract up. We'll see how yandere I end up making her (and I have some creepy ideas in my disturbed little brain), as to how scared vs. intrigued he'd be to date his own psycho sister.**_

 _ **Had someone ask me how Harry 2.0 made copies of the photos and letters. Vernon has an all-in-one printer. Scan and copy. By the POWER OF RETCON!**_


End file.
